And last but not least, the arrival of Kayler

So I was really excited to finish writing of my kids’ births. Like something terrible would happen in one day and I would never get the chance to write Kayler’s. I drive my self crazy sometimes.

Anyways, after Gavin we stayed in our first home for almost a year. We bought a bigger house and moved when he was 11 months. Right before we moved, I had started what would be a large struggle with “women problems.” Please forgive me, I am going to be a little graphic and descriptive….I had an IUD put in, because I knew that I didn’t want any more kids for a LONG time. Well, little did I know but I had a large ovarian cyst growing, and pressing on the IUD. I tried to tough it out….it was SO painful. I am so stubborn, but finally after 6 months…yes 6 months, I couldn’t even bend over without almost passing out. I made a Dr. appt and he did an ultrasound. He just looked at the screen, asked me if I had eaten anything before I came. I said no, I had been in a hurry. He said good, because you are going to surgery right away. I had an orange sized cyst and it was getting close to the IUD and so he just removed the cyst and IUD and that was that.

Well, all was well for a few months, until I realized that it had been 3 months since I had a period. I knew I wasn’t pregnant, so I headed to the Dr. again. Well there was another cyst. So I waited until I couldn’t take it any more, and he finally had to do surgery again. G.J. had in the meantime graduated from College, HOORAY! Hallie was almost 4 and Gavin 18 months. I was on no form of birth control whatsoever, and my body was just a mess. I would go for like 6 months with no period, then wham…weird things would happen and I would be so sick…it was a nightmare. Finally, when Gavin was 2.5 and Hallie was almost 5, the Dr. suggested getting pregnant again. First off, I was already happy with my two kids, a boy and a girl. Second, I had a terrible time pregnant, and I honestly didn’t think I could do it again. And Third, I thought for sure my body would not cooperate, but I told him that G.J. and I would have to pray about it. So a couple days later, something happened. It was the strangest thing EVER. We decided to go to the temple. We were doing sealings. We were just waiting at the end of a very long hallway in the temple. At the very end of the hallway was a picture of Mary holding the savior as an infant. It was so beautiful. I just couldn’t take my eyes off the baby. Then I saw a man walking towards me. I soon noticed that it was my Dr. (with whom I had a very special relationship with…him saving my life and all-on more than one occasion). He walked towards me, shook my hand and said hello. It was at that very instant that I knew that every thing would be o.k. and that I was supposed to have another baby.

So I was not surprised when the very next month, I was pregnant. I had to do a lot of ovulation testing and take more hormones, so it was not a huge surprise. I was very sad when at 5 or 6 weeks pregnant, I miscarried. I just figured that was the baby I was supposed to have and I was done with all of it. Finally I decided that I would give it one more try, but after that…it was over. So, after awhile, I realized that it was time to test again, and sure enough, I was pregnant. I was so excited.

That was of course until I started to get sick again. There were several times within weeks 6 and 20 that I had to have G.J. come home from work to take care of me. I threw up a little, but was so nauseous and week. I truly felt like such a wimp. I had my mom on one side saying that she was not sick not even one day in her pregnancies. I had some people even tell me that I must “make up” my morning sickness. I usually never ever wish my trials upon others, but for those people I wish they could just feel what it was like for maybe a week, and then they would change their tune a lot. There was a medicine called Zofran that helped a little, but at the time, it was $32 a pill…no joke. Now it is much cheaper. Luckily we had good insurance, but I still treated those things like gold.

Well, I just knew I was having a girl. I was shocked when my ultrasound said a boy. The same day of my ultrasound, my dr. did an in office check, and he said he thought for sure it was a girl. well that went on back and forth pretty much until 30 weeks until I had a 3D U/S (see pics above). It was definitely a boy. But I am getting ahead of myself. During some routine blood tests, the dr. realized that I had a blood disorder. Thrombocytopenia was what it was called….big word that basically means that my body did not make enough blood platelets. I had to have it checked every week from 20 weeks on. That was when the Dr. called us in for a serious talk. The condition itself is not necessarily life threatening, but after you have had it with one pregnancy, it will most likely show up in future pregnancies, and get worse with each one. He told me that I was very lucky to have 2 almost 3 kids. He said it was time to get serious and make the decision to not have anymore kids, permanently. After G.J. and I thought about it, we realized that A. 3 kids was PLENTY. B. I could not endure pregnancy ever again. And C. what if I got pregnant again and had more serious complications and died-that would leave him all alone with no wife and 4 kids with no mommy. So after much praying, we decided that G.J. would take a little visit to the dr. and end our childbearing years. That must have looked so funny. Him being 24 and me 23, headed to the dr. me big and pregnant (we waited until I was 24 weeks, so that the baby would be big enough just in case something happened) to have him “fixed”…hehe. (G.J. will kill me if I say anymore, so I will just leave it at that)

So after that, the pregnancy just went on. I had one more hospital stay, for a nasty bout with the flu. That was NO fun. We checked my blood often for 2 reasons. # 1, to see how low it got, so that the hospital would have enough blood on hand in case I needed a transfusion, and #2 because if my blood levels were too low, I would not be able to have an epidural, because the blood would not clot quickly enough around my spinal area, and I could be paralyzed. The level it needed to be was at least 100. Most people have a level of 300-400 or so. I was not showing signs of starting labor early like the other kids. So 37 weeks came and went, but only 4 days later, at 37 weeks and 4 days, the Dr. decided it was time.

He didn’t want the baby to get too big and cause bleeding that would endanger me, so he just broke my water and admitted me to the hospital. We did the blood test that would determine my level for the day, so I would know If I could have an epidural. I was just praying for them to come back and say, it was 100…Well, I was very sad when they came back and it was like 50 or 60…..so no epidural. Needless to say, I was scared to death. I know women who do it ALL the time, with no issue, but I am a wimp, so I was so worried. My water was already broke, so there was no going back now.

I labored throughout the day, and this was actually my longest labor of all 3 kids. Finally by that evening things were INTENSE. There are not even words to describe how bad it hurt. They had me on the birthing ball, and I would pretty much pass out, then they would lift me up into the bed. It seemed like this went on for hours, but it was really only 30 minutes or so. My mom and dad were in the room this time, along with G.J. I hadn’t intended on my dad to come in, but he just sat in the corner behind the bed and cried the whole time. I wouldn’t have changed having him there for nothing.

Let me just say that I never ever cry, not even in the privacy of my own home. Well, I was crying there…and screaming, and I was SO embarrassed. Whenever I could, I would apologize and say…I am so sorry for crying…over and over. Finally the Dr. just said, you scream as loud as you want…and that is just what I did. Luckily, only 3 pushes later, Kayler arrived, safe and sound. He was exactly the same size as Gavin, 7 lbs even and19 1/4 inches long, born on May 4^th 2006.

I felt WONDERFUL after it was over. No numb legs, no hurting back from the epidural, and most of all, NO STITCHES (which I had a lot of with the other 2) I hopped right up and was able to be with him in the nursery and it was just great. I recovered SO quickly. I would never ever recommend natural birth to anyone, or never want to do it again myself, but still-the recovery was nice…

The kids enjoyed him so much. Let me just say that the 3^rd time was the charm. He was such a good baby, and I finally felt like I was doing the mom thing right. Hallie and Gavin were my practice babies! It was definitely an adjustment to three kids. It actually didn’t get all that bad until he learned to walk though, as silly as it sounds. Then it got really hectic. He is a little busy body! But He is such a very happy addition to our family. He is starting to talk so much, and it is so cute. I am so happy that we made the decision to have him, as hard as it was. I can’t imagine our family without him. We are now complete.

I am so glad that I decided to write down these experiences. I know these were SUPER DUPER Long posts…I had a lot of details that I didn’t want to forget. I know that I shared a lot of details about how difficult things were for me, which they were. I know that there are so many people out there who have MUCH worse situations than mine by far, and a lot more severe problems. I also know that there are many who don’t end up with 3 healthy babies like I did. A long with that, I have so many friends who have only got to have 1 baby, or no babies. So I am grateful in every single way that I have 3 beautiful healthy children, no matter how hard it was to get them here. I will continue to pray for some of my closest friends, Mandy, Briana, Jessica, Erin H. and Heather E. to be blessed with babies. My heart aches so often for them. I know the lord has a will and a reason for everything, trusting him and having the faith to do so is the hard part.

Even though this took a lot of time to do, I am very glad I did it. I now create my own “tag” I encourage each of you to jot down a few notes, if you haven’t already about your children(s) births. I would love to read about them on your blogs, or even if you just do it privately, having it written down is all that matters. Have a great day, and a wonderful weekend-conference weekend, HOORAY!