The days of sick kids

I’ve decided not to blog on weekends. My life isn’t interesting enough. What I chose today will be quite boring to most, but I’m having a pity party so I can do what I want to!

My kids get sick. A LOT. And I am so sick of them being sick I could scream. Last week we went through our ELEVENTH hospitalization. Kayler came down with some sort of stomach virus. He threw up at 2 p.m., and by 7 p.m. he couldn’t even hold his head up and he was in the hospital until Tuesday night.

Their illnesses have mainly been intestinal/dehydration. We have had a few croup/pneumonia types too. I am always baffled at how my kids get so sick. I am one of the cleanest people I know. I rarely take my kids into huge public places with lots of germs. I am the annoying mom that meets them off the school bus with a bottle of purel and sprays Lysol on all their stuff. I try so hard to feed them well, let them get rest, keep them clean, give vitamins, etc.etc.etc. Yet, they always seem to catch whatever is going around, and it seems to affect them much worse.

One Dr. suggested a disorder that they could have. It is called neutropenia. It basically means that a person gets sick much more often and much more severe than the average person. There are many forms of it, but he believes they have the kind that gets much better as they get older, and I agree. It seems that the older they get, the less they get sick, but it is the getting there that is hard. He was hesitant to write this disorder in their charts because it does not look good on their medical records. Even with that diagnosis, I still don’t have much comfort sometimes

I know that every person-man, woman, child, baby are going to get sick sometimes. It is just the way things go. I accept that totally. I also know that without a doubt, the small things that my kids have gone through are MUCH less severe than the millions of kids who suffer with life threatening diseases every second of their lives.

The reason I am such a big baby about all of this is because I hate how their being sick messes up my life, how selfish does that sound. I first off and foremost feel so sorry for their tiny little bodies when they just do not feel good. There is nothing worse than watching your sweet little angels suffer poking and prodding and tests and them being scared. Anyone who knows me well knows that I am an over organized anally obsessive person who likes things in order. When my kids get sick, it throws things out of whack so bad and it takes so long to get things back in order. Like it has been a week since Kayler was in the hospital last, and I feel like I am barely catching up. To make matters worse, the money that is spent on medical bills and medicines is just so hard to handle sometimes.

Along with all that, I also have to go through the embarrassment of people thinking I am a bad mom and actually let my kids get sick or even worse, want them to-there is nothing further from the truth. I would need to be in a nut house if I actually felt that way. I am so embarrassed every time they get sick or get put in the hospital and I rarely even tell anybody. I actually live in a constant state of fear that my kids will get sick. I find myself not wanting to go anywhere or do anything with anybody that would get them sick. I have to reassure myself that I can’t live in a bubble, and that everything will be ok. Faith and patience and endurance and long suffering are thing I definitely need help with.

So, I’m sorry to all who read this boring blog, I just needed to vent on this certain topic. And if you can find it in your hearts, please pray for health and strength for my family. I could use all the help I can get! Have a good day!