A Decade in the Making

I feel like such a blog slacker. To be honest…there have been plenty of things to blog about, but I have had zero desire to do it. I think I am suffering from PMS….like in a BAD way, and yes…it is still possible to have PMS after having a hysterectomy because I still have an ovary and hormone fluctuations and all that. I have just not been myself lately. Pair that with a case of pity-party/feel sorry for myself/depressed/ornery-itis…..and my readers probably wouldn’t want to read anything I typed/blogged about anyways.

I will NOT however pass up the chance to blog about something very very important and special. Tomorrow (Thursday the 13th) is my 10th wedding anniversary! I just can’t believe it, 10 years seems like so long! A whole decade of my life.

So, I look back to my wedding day 10 years ago. I was only 17 years old. I was scared, so sick, 5 months pregnant, and SO unsure of what the future held. Nobody was very happy for us…and most expected us to fail. All I did know is that I was incredibly lucky to have G.J. as my rock by my side, never wavering in his support or love for me. I may have lost the love and support of most of my family and friends, but I still had him.

Fast forward through the years and we have gone through SO much. There have been more hospitalizations and surgeries for both me and the kids than I even can count. We struggled through college together. G.J. had 3 jobs at one point to make ends meet. There were times when I wondered if I had made the right decision. I felt guilty for imagining what my life would have been like if I had never met G.J. Then I would get scared to even imagine it….because even though it was hard, I had/have a lot to be grateful for-and I wouldn’t want my life to be any different.

G.J. and I are complete opposites in most things. Yet somehow, we compliment each other and make it work, and in a good way. G.J. always gets the short end of the stick dealing with me. Since I am not very close with my mom, and I don’t have any sisters….he has to fill that womanly role sometimes. He has to listen to my irrational worries and emotions. He has to deal with my insecurities and ornery moods. He always seems to be stuck at home with the kids after a long days work because I need to get out of the house to keep from going insane!

My dad said something the other day that at first kind of made me sad….but then I realized how true it was. He said, “I can’t believe you guys have made it this long.” Most kids…because lets face it, we were basically kids when we got married, do not make it being married that long starting out how we did. Most people who are pregnant when they get married don’t make it. Well we made it….and even had more stressors put on our marriage that usually break people up. Most people who have a special needs child have a MUCH higher divorce rate. I won’t lie….our marriage was a lot better/easier before we had the autism issues with Kayler putting a strain on us. But like they say, anything worth keeping is worth fighting for. My marriage and my eternal family are definitely worth all the heartache and trials throughout the years.

G.J. is my better half. Sure his computer/electronic/TV watching obsessions get to me…but there could definitely be worse habits. I could go on and on about the good and wonderful things he does as a father and husband. The main thing that makes me tear up thinking about it is that he loves me unconditionally no matter what. When the rest of the world seems to hurt or betray me, he is always there. He always compliments me on my looks…even though I am not the skinny beautiful girl I was 10 years ago (FAR from it actually….), he always makes me feel like I am beautiful and special. I love him with all my heart, and I can’t wait to share the next 10 years with him!!! Happy Anniversary G.J.!!!!

So as for celebrating……G.J. just informed me that he has to go to Salt Lake for work tomorrow on our actual anniversary. So I will spend the day/evening all alone. I had high hopes for YEARS of what we would do to celebrate our 10th wedding anniversary. It started out with plans for a cruise. Then a lack of money and a babysitter cancelled that idea. Then I had plans of going to Salt Lake to Little America and other fun stuff. Well, Hallie brought home a note saying that she had a piano recital this Friday night….so that kind of cancelled that idea. So I made plans for here in town, and got things all squared away several weeks ago. It is nothing special or elaborate by any means, but I was getting pretty excited. Then G.J. told me that it was father/sons campout. Since he is in the Elder’s quorum now, I really felt he should go…but I put my foot down. G.J. is the type that will ALWAYS put his church calling and his career ahead of his family, which I guess is a good trait, but this time I am not letting him. I talked to the Elder’s quorum president, and he was really nice about it. So I am donating food for the dinner, we are going to Hallie’s recital, and the rest of the evening is a surprise which I can’t post on here since G.J. reads my blog!